I'm truly enjoying

having my daytime hours free again.  I went to yoga for the first time in 2 months.  I've been able to check a few things off my long list of things to do. The garden and flowers are planted (in between rain storms).  I've turned the TV on some, but then I just want to turn it off and enjoy the quiet.   I've talked with friends and gone visiting teaching.  I've taken a nap.   Sometimes it takes going without something (like free days) to appreciate it more when you have it again.

Happy thoughts:  We visited Gary at the hospital and he was doing very well.  We leave for Missouri on Friday and are excited to spend time with the Bishop family and grandchildren.  (Hopefully there will be no more tornado's.  The devastation in Joplin Missouri is so sad).

And, as a last thought.  Sometimes I forget who may be reading these blog entries.  Then when I hear from someone, I feel kind of embarrassed by some of my silliness or my thoughts or my issues.   So, if you are reading this, just know that it makes me happy that you care enough to read about what is happening in our lives.  Sometimes I wonder why I do it at all.   But there is something driving me.  Maybe it is the need to connect with you.

But, I have one request.  

Please don't hold anything I 

do, write, think, or feel against me.

I'm still trying to figure it all out,

and writing about it is (kind of) helping me do that.
Besides, it does a person good to laugh
at themselves once in a while.

Growing old

and watching those we love grow older and more frail, is hard.   I think the passage into old age is perhaps the most difficult period of a person's life.  People have spent their lives being productive and active, and often those abilities diminish.  The more active and self-sufficient a person has been, the more adjustment it takes to deal with the physical challenges that make it hard to do what they've always done.  It made me sad to see Dad go through that.  He had never hired a anyone to do fix-it's in the house and he had always been the do-it man.  Yet as his eyesight and dexterity got worse, he had to give much of that up.  Having to depend on others for transportation and support was hard for him.

I guess I'm thinking of this particularly tonight because my brother, Gary, is going in to have knee replacement surgery tomorrow.   There should be no complications, but I worry about him because his health is more fragile because of his Parkinson's.   He and Lynn have amazing can-do attitudes, and Gary always says how much he appreciates all he is able to enjoy in life.  I only hope that at 73 I will be as sharp and positive as Gary is.

After we went to dinner with them tonight, Gary (hubby) and a neighbor gave Gary (brother) a blessing.  In the blessing Gary (hubby) mentioned how much Gary (brother) has contributed to and blessed other's lives for many years.  And how he will continue to do so as he recovers.  It was very comforting for me and made me grateful that we can call upon God and receive His blessings.   

What will I miss if and when I am no longer able to do what I do?  I will miss being able to do what I'm able to do. (Brilliant reasoning, I know).  Specifically:  Bake, create, listen (and actually hear), serve, read, be self-sufficient and productive.  Hopefully that will never happen.   But if it does, that is what I will miss.

Sorry. I'm just feeling a little melancholy tonight.

We had

a "Swap" at the church yesterday.  We had lots of  things donated, but we didn't have a lot of people come to take things.  So, as we on the committee were there for two hours, we kept walking around and picking up things ourselves.  I had donated several boxes worth of items, and came home with a little less than I had taken.  I guess that is progress.

I came home with some movies, books, a chair massage , and crepe maker (still in its box).  I had seen a crepe maker before, but wouldn't have bought one.  But it was free, so why not give it a try.  (Wait a minute, wasn't my last blog entry about not getting things because they were a good deal). 

I've always been a little intimidated by crepes, because I haven't had a lot of luck at making them.  I think I'll be making them more often now, because the crepe maker made it really easy. 

See, I was justified in bringing it home.

Some of

the thoughts copied  from the white board at our Relief Society Activity on Tuesday.

"Your house is your home only when you feel jurisdiction over the space".  Joan Kron

"Have nothing in your homes that you do not know to be useful and believe to be beautiful."  Willilam Morris

"Work is love made visible."

Our friend and ward member, Lisa, gave us an inspiring, informative, and also very entertaining presentation on cleaning, organizing, simplifying, and  " hating cleaning less."  Here is a link to her blog where she has shared her ideas:    Lisa's Practical Tips

What I came away with was a greater desire to be more "deliberate" in creating spaces in my home that are clean and beautiful.  She asked us to acknowledge the biases, traps, and weaknesses we have that keep us from creating the kind of home we want.  Here are some of mine:  Feeling overwhelmed (instead of just doing it).  Holding on to things I don't particularly care for or use, thinking that I might need it some day.  Collecting more of things I like, even when I do not have the space or need for it.   Buying things that are a great price, even if it doesn't fit into my ideal space.  Organizing "stuff" and trying to find a place for it, instead of "making a place" for the things we love and use.      

Bottom line is, I love having a clean and orderly home, but I don't particularly love the work it takes to make it that way.  Most of us don't.  But, Lisa presented ways to make it "sweet," by engaging the 5 senses and just changing out attitudes about it.   I need to go re-read her blog every week, just to get inspired all over again.   

Mom approached homemaking that way.  She would do her work, and then spend the rest of the day doing things she enjoyed, like reading,doing handwork, and visiting with people.   Her attitude was, if it needs to be done, do it.   Whereas, I tend to put off doing the housework or procrastinating what needs to be done.  But when I do that, I don't relax or enjoy what I'm doing, because in the back of my mind I'm worrying about the essential things I'm procrastinating.   Wouldn't you think I would have to figured out at my age?  Oh, well.

PS:  The cupcakes got delivered with no mishaps.  I'm feeling very relieved.

2 more days

of testing, and then I can sleep in a little! 

Tonight I made the last 9 dozen coconut cupcakes for the wedding, which is Friday.  I'll frost some tomorrow night and the rest on Friday right before I deliver them.  So far it has gone smoothly, with no mishaps.  I'll be relieved once they are frosted and delivered without a something drastic happening (like the carriers tipping over in the car).   I can hardly watch the shows like "Cake Boss" or "Cupcake Wars," during the part where they are transporting their large creations. 

When I'm making cupcakes as a gift or volunteer effort, I want them to turn out well.  But it is a different kind of pressure when you're making them for money.   At the Stake Women's conference, where we had all the cupcakes, a lady asked me if I made them for weddings or other events.  I told her that I really didn't, but that I would be glad to share the recipes with her. 

She followed up with me a few weeks later and really wanted them for her daughter's wedding, so I decided to give it a try.  I really didn't know what to charge, so I went with a medium price of 75 cents each.  I felt badly even charging that, but the verdict is still out about how profitable it will be once it's all over.   I'll definitely come out ahead, as the ingredients don't add up to that much, but It's hard to figure in my time.  I'm glad I've done it though, as it has been kind of fun.

There was a documentary

on last night that was fascinating to me. It was called the "Freedom Riders."  It recounts the events in 1961 when racial tensions were very high, particularly in the South. 

In May of 1961 I was 7 years old, so I was pretty oblivious to events beyond my own little world. Living in Provo, Utah, I had probably never even met someone of the black race.  Nor was I aware that there was such a thing as racial discrimination.   Since that time, I've obviously learned and read a lot more about the violations of human rights and discrimination.  But, what amazed me in this story was that, even as late as the 60's, many of the State and Federal governments were still blatantly disregarding racial rights and laws. 

Here is a recount of the "Freedom Riders" from a commentary in the Washington Post last week. 

"In May of 1961, a group of black and white Americans departed Washington, D.C., and headed south. One group was on a Trailways bus; the other took a Greyhound bus. Their goal was to see if Southern bus terminals were desegregated, as they should have been if the Supreme Court's 1946 Morgan v. Virginia ruling were being enforced. The Morgan ruling outlawed segregation in interstate travel facilities, but almost all Southern states pretended the ruling didn't exist.  When the people who would become known as Freedom Riders started their journey, it wasn't a case of civil rights activists engaging in civil disobedience to make their point.  What the Freedom Riders did was perfectly legal. What some state and local officials did -- think Alabama and Mississippi Govs. John Patterson and Ross Barnett, and Birmingham, Ala., Public Safety Commissioner Eugene "Bull" Connor -- was either illegal or malfeasance in office.  Things went peacefully for the Freedom Riders as their buses traveled through Virginia, North Carolina, South Carolina and Georgia.  Then the Greyhound bus stopped in Anniston, Ala., where a mob burned the bus and beat some of the Freedom Riders.  What happened when the Trailways bus arrived in Birmingham was even more despicable. Connor had cut a deal with Ku Klux Klan leaders: Their ruffians were given 15 minutes to attack the Freedom Riders before police intervened. Photographers from several newspapers caught the KKK thugs on camera savagely beating the activists.

I know I'm still somewhat oblivious to what has gone on and is still going on in the world.  But, after watching this program,  I now have a greater appreciation of how racial divides and discrimination have improved in the last 50 years.  I'm not naive enough to think it doesn't still happen.  But the fact that we are now being led by a president who is black, does show progress. 

It's late and

we're exhausted after spending the day digging and planting (in between rain storms, that is). 

But, I wanted to say Happy Birthday to my brother, Tom, who turned . . . . today.  I won't reveal his exact age, but let me just say that he is definitely a senior citizen now.   Love to you, Tom. 

And while I'm giving birthday wishes, I'll get ahead of myself and wish my sister, Charlene, a Happy Birthday on the 18th.  Adding  my two oldest brothers, Gary and Richard, in with Tom and Charlene, equals me feeling very blessed in the family department.

Here are pictures of the birthday girl and boy and me

just a few short years ago.

Well, maybe more like 50 years ago., but who's counting?

Certainly not me, the youngest of the crew.